30 days of devotion: common mistakes about Caffeina

The most common misconception about the goddess Caffeina is that she is responsible for your energy management.  Such is not the case.

Caffeina is the surge of sudden clarity you get that allows you to push through to the end of a term paper.  So too is she in the rush of energy that makes the last stack of filing disappear as surely as the first.  We call upon Caffeina to keep our minds sharp even as boredom and exhaustion threaten to dull our edge.

But it is also true that Caffeina is near during long nights of tossing and turning.  That feeling of your heart beating a bit more heavily, wary of an unknown threat?  That is her touch.  Jittery, anxious, insomniac . . . all these can come from a brush with this mighty goddess.

The forces influenced by the gods are powerful, which is one of the reasons that these beings should be approached with respect.  One does not blame Dionysos for their intoxicated driving, nor Haides for the death of a loved one, and likewise, one cannot expect Caffeina to shoulder the responsibility if her gifts are not used with care.

A related mistake that I have seen some Pagans commit is to be apologetic for their relationship with the Steamy Lady.  A group might spontaneously sing a rousing hymn to Caffeina, passing cups all around, when one member shamefacedly says, “I’m afraid Caffeina and I don’t get along.”

Cast away that shame, I say!  For it is not what you seem.  Those who find themselves terribly sensitive to the effects of caffeine are indeed more blessed; indeed, these special few often require simply the intoxicating aroma of the brew, or even just to think of the Dark Mother herself, to be within her energetic embrace.  What we of the modern world call a “caffeine problem” is in fact the mark of her most favored!

So if you find yourself in such company of coffee-loving Pagans, and you do not yourself imbibe, hold your head up high, and proudly proclaim, “I am chosen by Caffeina, and have sworn an oath to take no physical caffeine while I am in her service.”  For whether or not you are aware, that is indeed the compact that she is asking to make.

This post is part of a series, 30 days of devotion to Caffeina.

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